they wait...

i want to write. i cannot, i just cannot. i cannot do anything. my body refuses to move. static. stiff fingers. pain. every action, every word, every thought hurts. its killing me. i cry. seek help. silently. it wont come, i know. but i wait. wait, silently, patiently. killing everything that's alive, slowly, silently. it leaves me, gradually. the process is fulfilling, interesting. its interesting to see yourself decaying, rotting. i smile, it reaches my dead eyes, vanishes; in a flash, like everything else. i cant stay anymore, i HAVE to leave. they are calling me, oh so loud, i can hear them, screaming, whispering. i have to go. they are pulling me, i dont want to go. hold me, please, dont let go. but i have to, need to. they want me there, need me there. they pull me away, it feels nice. to be dead.